"It's Time for a Few Small Repairs", she said.

Or large ones. 

sorry for the blurriness, cats, and my sleeping kids in the background. 

I got on the scale today. 

229.6

UGH. It's easily the heaviest I have ever been, and I feel horrible about it. 

Before anyone preaches to me about loving yourself at any size, I do love myself...and this is why things have to change. I love myself enough to realize that this is not a healthy weight for me. 

My older sister sent me pictures of us from her wedding. 

dang it, y'all, I was CUTE. and skinny. 

I realize that 16 year old me is an unrealistic goal. I've been pregnant 5 times since then, I have two living kids, I'm pumping for my 11 month old...blah blah blah. But I can be better than 229.6

Hell, I HAVE to be better than 229.6

I'm GOING to be better. 

I finished day 1 of the May exercise challenge. 

It's a brand new month and I am honestly ready to kick some ass. 

I think one of the things that's killing me is sitting down to pump and then dragging my ass (watching Netflix etc) even after I'm done pumping. 

NO more. 

I already gave up Dr. Pepper...actually all soda. I need to up my water intake too. 

Small steps!!!!